While waiting to meet a possible new client at SM BF’s Caffe Bene, I run through my notes and found an old blog draft. It’s been a while since I wrote it but the gist is quite appropriate to what I’m feeling at the moment. The scribble had grumpy tone, ha! So to dash a little humor, I had to revise a bit and insert cute images.
Stopping completely doesn’t always mean quitting; it may also mean respecting our set boundary and being aware when something has gone too much (that it does not feel right anymore). Each of us may define our own red signal; we all have a different tolerance level anyway. But what commands you to quit?
The gauge may vary depending on who (or what) is involved but it all sums up to what we feel toward a given scenario or relationship—intimate or otherwise. Some people are oddly fond of getting hurt or may appear too insensitive to even discern it. Yet there must be a common denominator to make us strike that quit button, right? I’m sure you can relate from the following animated pain points:
1. Are you starting to feel consistently unhappy about this person having an I-Me-and-Myself Syndrome? The world revolves around him and no else is more important in the universe but himself.
2. Is the relationship becoming one way? You come to finally realize the other as self-absorbed, self-centered, and just blatant selfish. He can hit you with a bow-and-arrow and won’t even bother if he hurts you.
3. Do you feel like giving a lot and is still underappreciated? Your lifesaver is always ready for her but you’ve never seen her do the same for you.
4. And again, is the other party keeping with the “I, I, I” and never even a bit interested of the “You“?
5. Okay you made an attempt to talk and you did—only to find out you are talking to no one as they become too engrossed on the smart(er) phone.
6. Have you tried to tame her endless, nonsense, one-way talk with your effort of sharing your thoughts but the person remains skillfully not listening and inattentive (because the highlight of the conversation is not about her anymore)? You just want to splash that cold water on her face to disrupt the eternal self-obsessed bearing.
7. Disappearing when needed and claims to be robustly busy. She won’t mind if you need help because helping you won’t benefit her in any way? Letting you feel alone, helpless and drowning with all her fake promises.
8. But is popping like a ghost when she is the one in dire need and acting like a boss—it is a must to prioritize her demands ASAP!
The list can go on and on, but maybe two or three of these actions are already enough sign to stop. No one has the right to hurt us, to make us feel unhappy and unworthy. Know what you deserve and appreciate your own value so no one else but yourself can dictate it for you.
All Images courtesy of bplanet at FreeDigitalPhotos.net